 Manners Matter
Manners Matter with Truman and Mrs. F
Q. Why do we have manners? I think they're weird. Nola H.
A. Dear Nola,
Good question. Are manners really helpful or just plain strange?
We have manners for many reasons that are designed to help us in two ways:
1) learning how to treat other people, and
2) developing self-respect.
The way you act and the things you say and do can either help or hurt you, and how polite you are (or aren't) will make you stand out, whether you realize it or not. Manners will help you get positive attention!
No one is born with manners, and just like math, science and history, learning them can take a while. But they are just as important as learning proper grammar. Think about this: All of your talents and accomplishments might go unnoticed if you don't know how to behave and treat other people. This is one way that having manners can really help you a great deal.
Etiquette, or manners, can mean that you know which fork to use when you sit down to a meal and what to do with your napkin when you are finished eating, but the more important part of learning about manners is that you learn how not to hurt others' feelings, and are able to always be considerate of other people. This might mean that you
always say please and thank you.
learn to wait your turn.
do not interrupt other people when they are talking.
learn how to be a gracious winner or maybe an accepting loser.
know how to react when someone treats you unfairly.
help others in need.
always tell the truth.
Further, manners are not at all about being fake or acting snooty, but rather it is all about being more authentic by doing things like
listening.
speaking when spoken to.
learning to accept differences in people.
developing your own set of beliefs and learning how to stick to them.
Manners can also be learning about when it is OK to say "no" without adding a "thank you." You do not have to say "no, thank you" to protect the privacy of your body nor to drugs, alcohol or anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. In this case, knowing about manners can help keep you safe.
I hope you find that you have a place in your life for manners, and I hope that you will from now on, not think of them as weird, but rather as the most natural thing in the world.Thanks so much for your question!
Truman and Mrs. Susan Fleming will be glad to answer your questions on manners and etiquette. Susan Fleming is a home economist, editor and lifestyle writer, specializing in the areas of entertaining and children's etiquette. E-mail your question to manners@kidsvillenews.com. If we use your question in the publication, you will receive a
Kidsville News! t-shirt!
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